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Archive for the month “July, 2012”

It’s my Affliction, Their my Addiction

Image Typically when one thinks of an addiction, the first thought that comes to mind is the use of any intoxicating substance that can be inhaled, injected, digested, or smoked. These substances are reportedly illegal, and the justice system has designed a whole task force to engage in a “war on drugs”, to rid our society of such ills. There is obvious concern, the use of these substances can alter one’s life to the point of destruction. So caution to not use them always hang in the balance. 

I reviewed this business about addiction this am, and realized that I too am an addict. Addicted to probably the worse drug that has ever existed. To be truthful, I have had a couple of bad reactions, but my need for this particular drug never ceases to desist. I crave it, I want it, like any junkie I need it bad.

I remember my first time getting high, most of us probably remember that first time like any junkie, we all strive to get a high like the first time, we keep using and using and eventually you become an addict attempting to get higher and higher every time.

First, I inhale, the inhalation is never twice the same, but just as intoxicating each time, it has the ability to linger around even after the after, next its to be digested, this process can be just as intoxicating as inhalation, but it depends on how you digest it, sometimes you can control it, but never let it control you, and at last is the injection. Usually the best part about this drug, sometimes you get a bad batch, but you can always make the most of it, you junkies know what I mean. 

You see this blog entry isn’t about sex, but rather the opposite sex. My addiction is MEN, I love the broad shoulders, the wide chests, the chiseled chins, the big hands, sometimes long or short fingers, the hard but soft caress, the manly but graceful walk, the ever famous triangle …….ahhh I can go on and on.But, I’m sure you understand. My best drug use is always when I get a good supplier, it takes me to worlds unimaginable, I soar high above the clouds, things make sense where they made none before. World peace exists when there is chaos all around you, sometimes the feeling is fleeting, but who ignores a good high when you have one. Your only goal now is the next best high. Now you’re hooked, there’s no turning back.

Now, don’t be fooled, my drug use has definitely had its way with me, this last trip was a bad trip for sure, but all that means is I have to find a different supplier. The drug I want, I want in it’s purest form, no weak stuff, no stand in for the good stuff, no “use this” instead of “that”, none of that “get high by any means necessary”. I am faithful to my drug, it was made just for me. It doesn’t mean I’m weak, It just means that I have a vice, and my love for it will not change, I’m a realist, willing to admit my supposed faults, don’t judge me.

” It’s my Affliction, Their my Addiction”. 





Sometime ago I gave the social networking site Facebook a break, it was around the same time I decided to give my marriage a break! At that time I had 556 friends and that included my husband! At that time I considered him a friend, a different kind of friend than a facebook friend obviously, but a friend nonetheless.

My very first blog disclosed that instead of planning for my 1st yr anniversary, I would be planning for a divorce. Obviously not one of my highlights! The anniversary day has come and gone, but with anticipation of somberness and that it was! This day was impacted by the sudden illness of my father and facebook friend #556 (i.e the husband) decided to have me served with divorce papers at the hospital where my father laid ill. I was filled with so many emotions, not upset about being served, but rather angered at the audacity of serving me while I’m dealing with such a pressing issue as my fathers illness. And in case you’re asking yes, friend #556 knew my dad had fallen ill. One thing I can give him credit for is his endless ability to make any situation worse, and this was one of those times!

Today, I chose the title Unfriend, (only a real word in Facebook world), because I logged in after a 6 months hiatus and unfriended #556. I had much purpose of logging in, and I didn’t want the joy of my return to be ruined! So I unfriended him, with a sort of vindication. The process was much deserved however, because he has done so many things that FRIENDS just don’t do! Friend– the title that one should bear first if you are a lover of a wife, a husband, a sister, a brother, basically any person of an intimate nature. So isn’t it befitting to unfriend someone when they violate the first rule of friendship which is love? When you take something so free, so unending and attempt to trap it like a firefly, isn’t severance the best solution? I think so! It’s funny because I don’t think #556, understands what it means to be a friend, or even what it means to have a true friend! So it baffles me when I think about how I entered contractually with him emotionally and legally! I don’t remember there being a shotgun at the wedding!

Either way today was a cyber world unfriending! A millisecond was all it took! Unfortunately, the legal unfriending will take a little bit longer! I never thought I would be brought to such thoughts, but both processes are well deserved!

#556 you have been unfriended!


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