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Bitter Bi%£¥* Brew

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I recently had the opportunity to try a new drink at first it wasn’t a favorite, but the truth in the matter is, the drink was like eating your favorite chips, having one just isn’t enough. Actually once you have a sip of the Bitter Bitches Brew, it’s hard to put the drink down, everything in your soul tells you to move on to something else, but you sip and sip and now you’re drunk.

Here is the recipe

Some of your recipes may vary, but here are the basic ingredients!

 

1- Part a**hole

1- Part decent girl

1- Sprinkle of dopamine

1- Night of unbridled passion 

1- Big azz wedding or Justice of Peace ceremony

1-  Big azz mis-understanding, infidelity or empty pockets (which ever suites   your taste

1- Pinch of reality

1- 12 oz glass of tears

Mix ingredients well

 Allow 2-3 yrs to simmer

Broil for 3-6 months, allow concoction to bubble over into your work life, into your children and family life, if your concoction is now green, frothy and tastes bitter-sweet, your brew is now ready to drink.

Disclaimer

There will be an absolute  inability to drink the  Bitter Bitches Brew responsibly and without consequence,  it may cause you to distrust, mistreat and push away any new person in your life. The ability to have fun is no longer an option, moping and sadness will definitely ensue. And forget who you were because you will now be known as a Bitter Bitch amongst, co-workers, family and friends. But its okay because the Bitter Bitches Brew is  tasty, addictive and it warms you late at night.  So a toast to you ladies out there, my cup runneth over, I know yours does too.

 

Enjoy or Put your cup down

 

 

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Pink Bootz (Check)

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Today if you were in NYC you would know your rain boots and umbrella were more than just an accessory they were a necessity. (I rhymed just a little)
But have you ever noticed that when you have on your rain boots, you become some what invincible. You begin to the walk the streets as if you were one of the toughest gansters to ever walk the earth. You take on puddles of all depths, you take on raindrops of all sizes, oh and it helps if you have an oversized umbrella, you know the ones that people roll their eyes at because you’re taking up an insurmountable amount of walking space, because your umbrella looks like a picnic table covering.

Well today having my accessories was not an accident, it was planned. I had the following items: Big Azz Umbrella (check), and my Pink Bootz (check), and would you know, at no point in time today did I have the displeasure of being wet. Thank Ya Jaysus.

Today I was gang banging on rain. Because I was prepared, I had all my neccessary tools. I felt like there was nothing (rain) that is, that would defeat me. This feeling is a first for me. Sounds simple but it was profound. It was today that I wondered, if in the past I would have prepared for my rainy days, would they have been so disappointing. Even on the days when the sun was shining, it still felt like it was raining, unprepared for any rainy day, I damn near drowned. No life boots, no life umbrella, believed in the Lord, but didn’t trust in him. I was caught in the rain with no accessories.

But today my boots provided me with the guidelines for how I should proceed with the rest of my life. The first rule :Take good measures to be prepared in life, Always wear your Pink Bootz. Walk out the door to wherever life leads you with the neccessary accessories. Or the storms of life will definitely drown you. I walked around NYC as if it was sunny today, umbrella wide, boots to the knee and I was smiling. Today I found my covering, and not one time did I get wet.

Who knew my Pink Bootz would give me such life?

Pink Bootz (Check)

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